Cancer and our physical relationships

I am writing this on a very quiet day, and I was reflecting that I have now written over 80 posts since I started this blog. I thought that I must have written about most subjects connected with cancer, but I realised that there is one important subject that I haven’t  touched on, and I don’t really know why! I thought that maybe because it is such a sensitive subject, I have avoided it, but that isn’t really my style at all, and is a very important part of our lives, so here we go.

In most cases, our physical relationships are very closely linked to our mental well being. If things are good in our lives, happy days, our sex lives are great! When things get tough, then our physical relationships tend to suffer as well. This is ok, if your tough time is only temporary, but if you have been diagnosed with a long term illness, it can be very tough to keep sex on the agenda.

When facing life or death situations, your physical relationship, probably doesn’t score highly on the to do list, but if you are lucky enough to come through that experience, how fully does your life proceed? I have had many discussions with my fellow patients over the years and in a lot of cases this subject produces laughter! My opinion is that people affected by cancer feel comfortable talking about these sort of issues, to someone who has experienced the same kind of things. This is because, they are the only people who can truly understand what is involved.

We all find it difficult to talk about our relationships, and that subject is up there alongside personal finances, in terms of subjects that are almost taboo for chit chat.But in my opinion, getting that side of your life up and running again, is a massive step forward for your general well being. I also feel that it is a part of your recovery that is totally overlooked, when you are outside the hospital environment. After a cancer diagnosis and treatment, it can feel like you are left alone to pick up the pieces of your life.

For life to get back on track, a lot of psychological issues need to be dealt with, to enable the physical issues to happen naturally. There are a lot of pieces to put together, before you can see the complete picture. If you are reading this and you are lucky enough not to have experienced any of the above, maybe you know someone who has, and this might help you understand some of the situations involved. If you have experienced anything similar, maybe you would like to share your observations?