My working life before cancer, was almost perfect. Apart from doing too many hours, it had everything that I wanted. Good pay, benefits, travel, contact with many different people around the world, and it involved buying and selling, which were things that I realised I was good at. The main thing for me was variety. You never knew from day to day what would be happening and who you would be talking to. Busy, quiet, good or bad, every day was different.
Then came cancer, to put a spoke in my working wheel! Regular treatment and appointments followed by resting at home. To top it off I spent months in isolation trying to recover from various complications. Not only did I feel very sick, I felt fed up with the routine of things. Physically, my body was coping but mentally it was tough. Being woken at the same time every day, meals, drugs and treatment, all part of a regimented routine.It was fine for my body, but I felt I was going crazy.
They say to be careful what you wish for, and the idea of some time away from work did have a certain appeal, but not for long.My mind started playing tricks on me, and I really believed that I could return to work, quickly, and be the person I was. No way! The reality is, I now struggle to cut the front and back lawn in the same day.Although my brain tells me that I can run the world, my body struggles at a keyboard.
But the good news! Despite the recent years of pain and boredom, I have been able to get involved doing lot’s of different things associated with my illness. I work with several charities, and have numerous small projects going on.I also now spend a lot of time writing. Either for my own blog or other articles, when I get asked.
In a different way, the variety of my working life has returned.From not being known by anyone in the cancer sector, I am now contacted by a wide variety of people, from all walks of life. If I’m lucky I get to talk to some famous people, but also some very senior members of the medical profession, writers from around the world, and people like me affected by cancer.I never know what the next email or phone call will bring.
Currently, I am excited by things that are happening in my working life, as the phone and emails get busier.So many lovely people, are beginning to find me, from all around the world, and I have some exciting things happening in 2013. Many of which, I would never have imagined. In the last few years I have experienced so many positive things, and still continue to.
Which prompted me to think about, how the curse of cancer struck me, took away a lot of my hopes and dreams, and some of those of my family. My future is just day to day, but I now have back, that variety, for which I craved. Yes, I have worked like crazy for some of those things to happen, but they have. I can deal much better with my health issues if my mind is busy, and I am fully occupied.
The feedback I receive, fuels my desire to do more, until my body lets me know to take a break.I have been shown talents I never knew I had, and am able to help enrich the lives of others in a small way.I am mentally re energised. The ironic thing is that none of this would have happened if I had not got sick.All the people that are now a major part of my life, I would never even have met!
The people are very much my blessing, but the curse never feels far away.