Positivity, do you have it?

One of the most common phrases used by people talking to cancer patients is, ” You must stay positive!”  This is something that not only applies to people who are unwell, but everyone really.It has become a bit of a throw away line now, as it is said so frequently in many different scenarios. My comment on this phrase is that you really must consider the person that you are talking to before you use it.There are many people who just do not feel at all positive about their situation, no amount of telling them to be positive will change that. In many instances it just makes them feel worse!

On my recent visits to hospital for my treatment reviews, I have been told that I will need my treatment to continue, at least until Christmas. As you know it is a very harsh regime, and my Consultant has been amazed what my body has withstood.( Me too if I’m honest!) It is every two weeks but some people have it only monthly. I told them that I wanted to continue on my current cycle, so that I could complete it as quickly as possible, as I wanted to try and get on with my life.She said I had a very positive attitude.I didn’t really see it like that. I just want to get to a stage in my life, where I can start living by some choice, and not dictated by my health.But I guess that I always have to remember, that I’m grateful to still be here moaning!!

I have always been a positive person, as I have mentioned in some previous posts, but it got me asking why? What makes me that way? Why can’t people become like that when they need to, and logic tells them that it would be in their best interests? What an incredibly interesting species we are. You can put people into an identical scenario, and you would have completely different results.We all understand things differently, hear things differently, and say things differently.Some people will be positive, and others will be unable to see any.

Regarding my own positivity, I have a few ideas where that came from as I most definitely wasn’t born with it! I was very poor at school, so when I left, I was under the impression that I was heading for the scrapyard. But it turns out that I was good at something, and achieving in the business world became routine. That in turn gave me confidence, and I started to believe that whatever I touched would turn to gold. In most instances it did, and the more times it happened the more my confidence grew.

Age, also goes hand in glove with experience. So as I got older, I had dealt with a lot of major challenges in my life, and felt that I could handle most things that came my way. Thus my confidence grew further. Why shouldn’t I now be confident? I thought I could conquer the world!! It seems that nature has decided otherwise.

Even when given my very poor prognosis, I was still positive. My life experience had shown me that even under the most difficult circumstances, I had come through.I have to keep thinking like that. I have seen all the facts and figures about my disease and treatment, and I have had almost every possible complication there is, but I still believe that there will be some life for me, after all this is dealt with. I feel that I have come too far, to give up now.

I make people smile, when I say that I look at life as a game of Snakes and Ladders. I have spent a long time, getting half way up the board, and although I have gone up a few ladders, I have certainly landed on a few snakes! This time I aim to only get the ladders.

Positivity. Are we born with it, can we learn it, do you have it or not?  What do you think?


  1. I blog frequently and I genuinely appreciate your information. Your article has truly peaked my interest. I am going to bookmark your website and keep checking for new details about once a week. I opted in for your RSS feed too.

    • Hi. I’m very pleased that you are enjoying the blog and finding it useful. There is a lot more interesting content to come, so I hope to see you back soon.
      Many thanks for taking the time to write.

  2. Hello Chris,

    Such a lovely blog post and I think it is so great to hear someone be so open and truthful. I think positivity comes from a state of mind dependent on the support you have from others. Those who are lucky to have people to draw that positivity out can thrive with such good thoughts. I know as you volunteer with us, blog about your experiences and help others you truly offer a positive spirit to keep everyone going.

    Thank you for all your support again and for sharing your thoughts.

    You are an inspiration!

  3. Hi Leyla
    Many thanks for your lovely comments.The things that I write about, are all from personal experience, and by writing honestly, I want to encourage others to understand things that happen to them. A lot of people do not feel comfortable talking about issues surrounding cancer, and I want to try and improve that.

    I think my positivity, was developed over the years, and I am happy if some of it can rub off on others.

    Thank you for the support that you and everyone give me that enables me to do what I do. I couldn’t do it without you

    Glad you are enjoying the blog, and thank you for taking the time to comment.

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